ENGL 101 Section 6

Forum for students in ENGL 101 Section 6, Spring 2012, Washington State University


    Kady Carrougher

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    kady.carrougher

    Posts : 5
    Join date : 2012-02-24

    Kady Carrougher

    Post  kady.carrougher on Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:18 pm

    Truly Beneficial?

    Laura, a 15-year-old girl with incredible determination, had one ambition in life: to be a nurse. She would volunteer at her local hospital for several years now, and understood the profession like the back of her hand. She was eager to graduate high school and start learning subjects she actually had an interest in. One thing about Laura, though, is that even though she could handle high-stress situations in the emergency room, she had severe test anxiety. The second a piece of paper was placed in front of her with teacher’s eyes watching her every move, she would freeze up and draw a blank. Due to regulations in Laura’s state, she was forced to take standardized test to graduate high school, and with Laura’s condition, this wasn’t a walk in the park. Laura now works as a receptionist as her local shipping company, because the test told her she wasn’t college material. Standardized testing is extremely unbeneficial for it doesn’t test the true knowledge of our students.
    What is standardized testing? According to Linda McNeil, they were created “in the name of improving educational quality and holding schools and school personnel more accountable for their professional practice” and to “monitor children’s learning” (McNeil, 4). But is this test actually benefiting children’s learning in school? To prove this point, a well-respected teacher took the standardized test, and failed (Brady 1). He was very well-educated, successful man with a lot of credibility to his name for his status in the public view (1). As he took the test, thinking it would be no problem to him, he soon discovered that if he had based his successes on the score he received, he wouldn’t be the accomplished man he is today (1). He states that if he took these tests back when he was in school, he would have “been told [he] wasn’t ‘college material,’ and probably would have believed it, and looked for work appropriate for the level of ability that the test said [he] had” (2). Many kids, who have the potential to do great things for their community, or possibly the world, are held back by the standard of passing a test to move up in society. Also, the tests are projected to be more difficult that real-life situations. Kohn states:
    How many jobs demand that employees come up with the right answer on the spot, from memory while the clock is ticking? How often are we forbidden to ask coworkers for help, or to depend on a larger organization for support- even in a society that worships self-sufficiency? (Kohn 4).
    The reality of these tests is relatively small, yet we take them into huge consideration when determining a child’s future. Further, these tests don’t always prove that the smarter, more driven student will come out on top. A study was done testing this theory, and it was found that the “superficially” engaged kids who guessed their way through tests and copied things down had a “positive correlation with high scores” compared to the “actively” engaged students who strive for knowledge and ask questions to engage themselves (7).
    There is the argument for standardized testing as well. Many people, along with authority figures, like to see how students are progressing in the workplace. They also argue that it helps guides teachers to determine “what to teach students and when to teach it” (Margie 1). Though many agree that the test is imperfect, authority figures state that it is our obligational duty to not fight the tests, but improve them, for they are truly beneficial (Covaleskie 1-3). It is possible for these tests to one day serve a valuable purpose, but in the mean time, they are hindering students who are required to take them. It is ultimately categorizing and ranking kids percentiles that don’t accurately depict the student’s progress ( Kohn 10-11 ). This completely alters the future of today’s students and misleads capable kids to believe they aren’t up to par. This isn’t only detrimental to their lives, but to society as a whole, for the students of today are the future of the community.
    Even though Laura had saved many lives when volunteering and knew she would have made an incredible nurse, standardized testing got in her way. This required test effects many more than just Laura; it affects every student that comes in contact with it. Standardized testing should not be required for students to graduate or move onto college.


    x I need help lengthening
    x I need help with how to organize my facts
    x I need help with my thesis, is it clear ?
    x I need help with my conclusion

    Davisshyenne

    Posts : 6
    Join date : 2012-02-24

    Re: Kady Carrougher

    Post  Davisshyenne on Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:52 pm

    1. To make your paper longer try adding quotes that suppoert your idea, but longer block quotes. that helps alot.

    Davisshyenne

    Posts : 6
    Join date : 2012-02-24

    Re: Kady Carrougher

    Post  Davisshyenne on Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:55 pm

    Davisshyenne wrote:1. To make your paper longer try adding quotes that suppoert your idea, but longer block quotes. that helps alot.
    2. I think that to orginze your fats you need to introudce some of your qutoes more with your own words, its hard see where your paragrphs end and start beacuse of this web site but I know it helps me to make cataorgies in a way for each paragraph were you only take about this one certain issue.
    3. I cant tell where your thiese sentance starts.

    Davisshyenne

    Posts : 6
    Join date : 2012-02-24

    Re: Kady Carrougher

    Post  Davisshyenne on Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:58 pm

    4. In your conclusion just wrapp up everything eles you said in your paper it my sound repective but just reste everything you already talked about, im sure once you write more this will be eadsier to make your conclison longer and more of a wrap up.

    stephanie.webb

    Posts : 5
    Join date : 2012-02-24

    Re: Kady Carrougher

    Post  stephanie.webb on Fri Feb 24, 2012 3:05 pm

    Answers to your questions
    1. In order to make it longer you can use block quotes, put in your personal opinion, a way to fix the problem, and talk about counter arguments.
    2. For organizing your facts you can do a new paragraph for each fact and then you can maybe find similar facts and link them together.
    3. I can't find your thesis sorry.
    4. In your conclusion you can just summarize all your facts and relate it all back to your thesis and intro.

    Three things you did well.
    1. I liked your example about Laura.
    2. You did a good job supporting your quotes.
    3. Your citations are also very good.

    Three things to improve.
    1. Making your thesis more clear.
    2. Create more arguments (you may need to do more research).
    3. One of your citations is missing the authors last name it just says the page number on it.

    One question I have.
    Where is your thesis?

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